Start/2005-07-15/1

Feel the power! Behold The Grand Unified IMDB-Movie-Rating Decoder Ring!

Studio execs fear it.
Hollywood marketing flaks weep because of it.
Movie critics fall impotent before it.

But not you, for you will be its master!

Just in time for the summer's onslaught of crapola movies, I have compiled the most potent movie-discriminating arsenal known to Man. I have focused its fell potential into a circlet undreamt in all the Ages. This singular device, this perfect instrument, this matchless band – the sum of all that has come before and all that is yet to be – I offer to you in my outstretched hand.

Go ahead, take it. Don't be afraid, I am giving it to you. Yes, take it.

Oops.

Went right through the sewer grating, didn't it? Well, don't look at me. I'm not going down there.

Okay, then, Plan B: I have another ring – not quite of the same caliber, but it works well enough. With it you can tell the decent movies from the crap, the good movies from the merely mediocre, and perhaps a bit more – if you are discerning. And you look to be discerning. (Then again, you are reading this blog...)

Anyway, here it is. No, I am not going to hand it to you. Just take this hypertext link. Can't drop that, can you?

Behold: The Grand Unified IMDB-Movie-Rating Decoder Ring!

Enjoy!